Patrick's Post Game Wrap
- July 29th, 2009
-Submitted by Mike Tollefson
Editor's Notes
First of all, on behalf of the 2009 Patrick’s Softball Team, I would
like to thank Bill Arthur, Mike Krennik, Dave Zeller, and Darin Pesta for
traveling to St. Peter and once again strapping on the cleats and suiting
up for the team. With many of
the regular team members unable to play this week due to conflicts, the
team appreciates their willingness to step up when we needed them.
OK, now that the obligatory niceties are out of the way, let me be very clear; graciousness, kindness, and praise are not the way of this team. Affection and admiration for another player is instead shown by the degree to which that player is mocked and ridiculed for actions before, during, or after the game. With that being said, let the love fest begin.
Game Summary
The first sign that things were about to go horribly wrong occurred when
Bill Arthur arrived at the fields promptly at 5:55.
The mere fact that Bill was going to play softball at all could
have been construed as a bad omen by itself.
It became immediately apparent that Bill’s advanced age
had manifested itself in the form of early Alzheimer's when it was
discovered that Bill had not only forgotten to bring “game” (this is
not unusual) but also his glove, softball shoes, and socks.
Clues as to the
outcome of the evening’s game mounted as Mike Krennik arrived at the
ball fields for stretching and calisthenics at 6:01 (that’s right, I
said Krennik made it to a softball game 30 minutes before game time –
for the record, he had intended to be there at 5:30).
As Krennik strolled into the ballpark, a 40 yard BenGay vapor trail
that could peel paint off a wall followed him into the park.
Fresh off of a hamstring
injury sustained several weeks earlier, Darin Pesta arrived at the ball
park, following a rigorous rehab regiment which apparently consisted of
sitting on the couch, eating potato chips, and posting comments on
Facebook via his Blackberry.
Dave Zeller arrived just as the team was taking the field for the top of the first. With no time to warm up, Dave ran out to his position in the outfield and immediately fielded a ball, which he attempted to throw back into the infield. However, the throwing mechanics had not yet been re-established and the ball was hurled into the ground about 10 yards in front of Z and rolled back into the cut off man.
All told, the average age of the ten players present that evening was 36.9 (this included Sean Mulcahey who just turned 25). Someone should have told the concessions stand to replace the starburst candy and bubble gum with Geratol and Metamusil.
The first three batters
in the line-up (Mike Tollefson, Cory Hoerner, and Geem), all of whom would
qualify for a 35 and over league, went a combined 1 for 12 with two strike
outs. All told, the team
would strike out 6 times in the game.
Mulcahey struck out twice (that may be a first by the way).
The team somehow managed seven runs but it was not enough as the
Little Dandy team defeated Patrick’s by a final score of 12-7.
The Patrick’s team was
ushered into the looser’s bracket where they faced Embassy Bar/RBC later
that evening. By this time numerous players were noticeably limping.
At several points in the game, a pinch runner was requested.
However, in each instance it soon became clear that the option off
the bench was even worse than the injured runner on base.
At one point Krennik jumped up off the bench to replace Geem as the
runner on first, then apparently sustained some sort of back injury on the
way, turned around and limped back into the dugout (it should be noted
that Patrick’s was occupying the dugout along the first base line so
this distance was no more than 10 yards).
Darin Pesta, who was already bruised and bleeding from an attempted
slide, re-injured his hamstring, which theoretically slowed him down
(though quite frankly it was tough to tell).
Mercifully, the game eventually came to an end and Patrick’s was eliminated from the tournament with a 14-12 loss, effectively ending their season. The evening was not without it’s bright spots however:
-
During the second game, the top three batters reached safely in 12 of their 15 plate appearances
-
Veterans Bill Arthur and Mike Krennik fielded the middle infield positions admirably
-
Dave Zeller finished the night 5 for 6 with a double and a walk.
Most Preposterous Statement
While this was Mike Krennik’s first
appearance of the year, he didn’t waste any time in making an impact on
the PGW as he contributed the following statement.
“I always show up to baseball games an hour and a half ahead
of game time to warm up and take batting practice.“
Nice try Krennik, but we all know you haven’t been that early to
anything in your life. Congratulations
on uttering this week’s most preposterous statement.
Key Stats
This year's team posted a .461 batting average which was the 4th highest
in team history. On the contrary, the team posted a .532 OB% which
is the 2nd lowest. This is consistent with a trend that has occurred
over the years in which the gap between batting average and OB% has
narrowed. I believe this is proof that we are facing better teams in a
more competitive league now than in the past. As a result, we reach
base fewer times as a result of walks, or fielding errors.
The following is a response to this PGW from Steve Becker:
I just read the last Post
Game Wrap for 2009, "Aged, Injured & Eliminated." It
was Absolutely beautiful. The whole scene was a Rembrandt, a
frick'in Picasso, if you were a painter, and you might be one. I
could taste the love... and the smell of BenGay 1,000 miles
away... and it smacks of truth. Yes sir man, the lov'in was there.
The Schmeze had me in tears after the 7/22 Wrap. I mean how
much can a man take before he simply breaks down and weeps
a river of salt. It tore at my heart like nobody's business. I'm
going to a therapist now and it was tough to find a good one in
Livingston. Most of them stare out the windows at the mountain peaks until
they can't relate to the little guy anymore. But I'm ok now and
I should be ready to go again next year. PS) I almost set Gary
up with my sister after that. Fortunately, my therapist stopped
me. That's what they do for $200 an hour, they stop you from doing
something dumb when you're emotionally unstable.
Those post game wraps are peanuts and cracker jacks for the
soul.
Cheers,
#21